Friday 29 October 2010

Halloween parade; survival of the fittest

So this morning the infamous Halloween parade took place.

Littleboy 1 went off to school in his black bat costume, very overexcited (having climbed into bed before 7am asking 'do I wear my costume today?). I dropped Littleboy 2 at preschool as early as I possibly could (8.50am) aware that the parade would start at 9am and parking near the school would probably be difficult. But I had NO idea...

I realised from the amount of traffic along the route that every single bloody parent in town was driving to the school (due to the zoning in the area, hardly anyone lives near enough to walk). At the school, naturally the carpark was already full, and it was mayhem on the surrounding streets. Enormous cars were everywhere, their occupants zealously scanning the normally quiet residential area for parking spaces - never easy when you have to avoid parking near fire hydrants, on the wrong side of the street for street cleaning and other idiosyncratic restrictions which New York seems to love.

Eventually I managed to park about half a mile away and, at two minutes to nine, set off at a sprint along the road. I was not the only parent doing this by any means - luckily my weekly kickboxing class stood me in good stead as I am reasonably fit, and managed to overtake about half a dozen overweight Dads on the way. Meanwhile mothers were running in heels, business suits and with buggies - as we arrived at the school, one fellow runner said to me between gasps for breath; "I gotta be at my other daughter's school in XX (another town a few miles away) at 9.30. So I'm just gonna take one picture and GO."

Anyway, I made it just in time and switched on the video camera to catch Littleboy 1's class exiting the school and parading around the playground. Readers of the previous post will be glad to hear that most people did 'respect the integrity of the cordon' - except for one younger sibling, who was so excited that he ran out to see his brother and had to be herded back pronto.

For some reason my firstborn looked rather downcast during the parade itself, only managing a half smile when he saw me. I asked him if anything was wrong and he replied that he was 'really sweaty' - odd, considering it was a pretty chilly morning. I can only think that he had raced around so much in his costume before it even started that he was completely done in - no doubt all will be revealed later.

The Doctor, busy at work, scores nulle points for not being at the parade - every single Dad appeared to be there. It hadn't even occured to us that the Doctor should come (don't we ever learn?) but I reckon next year he might have to be granted a special dispensation for essential Halloween activities.

Still, it's not over yet. Tomorrow there's another parade, at our local parenting centre, followed by trick or treating on the day itself. It's just nonstop fun here in pumpkin land, and I'm going to be exhausted by Monday.....

Monday 25 October 2010

Another Halloween newsflash. And now for your parade instructions....

So, you want to know how seriously Halloween is taken here? If the decorations weren't enough, here's proof.

The other day I received a letter from Littleboy 1's school. Not only is the possibly the longest missive I've ever had from the Head Teacher, it is also the most comprehensive in terms of its detail and instructions. No, it wasn't about the coming parent-teacher meetings, or the curriculum, or the screening of kindergarteners for educational difficulties. It was about the annual Halloween parade.

I had some vague idea that they might be allowed to go to school in costume on the Friday before Halloween; let's just say that is an understatement. The school Halloween parade, it informs me, will be kicking off at 9am sharp, with students exiting the side doors. It then goes on to outline the prescribed parade route and inform parents of the best areas for viewing and photography. Parents are also asked to 'respect the integrity' of the cordon which will separate us from our little darlings in their costumes, before they re-enter the school again in time for lessons.

It sounds more like a military passing out parade than a chance for the children to show off their costumes - or, as the Doctor remarked when I showed him the letter, something out of Maoist China. What, we wondered, would happen if any child failed to show up in costume? Would they have to stay behind in the classroom? Or be forced to parade around ignominously in their ordinary clothing.....

Littleboy 2's preschool, in contrast, asks the children NOT to come to school in costume, for 'safety' reasons, but suggests bringing in a Halloween treat, one that is preferably 'not candy'. I suddenly remember that last year, they came home bearing little gift bags containing Halloween themed pencils, erasers and items such as plastic spiders, which various children's mothers had lovingly put together for every child in the class. No doubt even if I hotfooted it down to Target now, all this stuff would already be sold out, so I'm just going to pretend I have no idea that this is what's expected....

Meanwhile, in other Halloween news, the people down the road from us have once again erected their enormous inflatable witch, this year accompanied by a giant blow-up pumpkin. I had wondered if they weren't going to do it this year after all, and felt quite disappointed - had they had enough of Halloween? But no, this weekend it all magically appeared overnight. (I'd love to take a picture, but am terrified that they might read the blog and identify me.)

Final newflash - the other day I had to rush out and buy a replacement pumpkin for a distraught Littleboy 2, after we arrived home one day to find a squirrel sitting boldly on our porch, scooping out the middle and eating it. It was so ridiculous that I had to stifle my giggles while commiserating with the boys and simultaneously sweeping up chewed bits of pumpkin. The war on squirrels has now officially been declared...

Monday 18 October 2010

Homes and gardens - Halloween special

So I promised you Halloween decoration pictures, and now I shall deliver. But first an apology; it's a little hard to get good close up pictures of Halloween decorations on houses without looking like some kind of paparazzo, furtively pulling up in a car, winding down the window and getting a snap in before hurriedly pulling off. Not being the owner of a long lens camera, my efforts are taken from rather a distance (and disappointingly I had to leave out the one of the house with a huge spider above the door, because it just didn't show up...). I'll be back though - I definitely want to get some of the Christmas displays this year....

First picture - this was one of the more attractive Halloween displays I saw on my travels today. Note the array of pumpkins, gourds and squash, the beautifully thought-out fake spider webs, and the high quality gravestone (by the tree). It's no surprise that this house is in a particularly posh area, and I would not be surprised if some kind of exterior designer might have been involved....



House number two had made the most of their shrub-lined stairway with another good display of fake spider-webbery. In fact, most of the houses on this (again rather grand) street had some degree of spider-web action going on, so I wondered if it was becoming something of a competitive sport. If you look closely, you might spot a ghost in the hedge too.



And finally for today. Littleboy 2's 'pumpkin snowman'. He was so pleased when he spotted this one on a drive around town that I had to go back and find it again. I think it's fairly self-explanatory....




Thursday 14 October 2010

Trip or treat? Halloween health and safety.....

Halloween preparations are in full swing here. As of last weekend, everyone's decorations are up; perfectly normal suburban houses have now been transformed into haunted mansions, complete with fake gravestones on the front lawns, ghosts dangling from porches and fake spider webs all over the shrubbery. Our drives around the neighbourhood are punctuated by 'spot the pumpkin' games and in addition we've seen large inflatable black cats and even what Littleboy 2 called a 'pumpkin snowman' on local front lawns. (You'll have to use your imagination here....I do intend to take some pictures this year, but am just working out a way to do it discreetly.)

If more proof were required that Halloween decorations are an integral part of life in the US, this morning The Doctor forwarded me part of the local weather forecast that he had seen online, warning about possibly winds this weekend. It reads 'Residents should take precautions at this time to protect property...such as Halloween decorations....that are susceptible to strong gusty winds'. In other words, expect smashing pumpkins and flying inflatable witches this weekend....

And, as if this weren't enough, I have just received a press release, warning me about the dangers of Halloween and offering injury prevention tips, from the American Academy of Orthopaedic Surgeons, no less. Apparently, Halloween is 'among the top three holidays producing the most ER visits'. Injuries from Halloween are most likely to be finger/hand related ones (from all that pumpkin carving); and of course, jack o'lanterns are potential fire hazards.

Then there are those pesky Halloween costumes. The press release tells me that 'costumes should be flame retardant and fit properly' and that 'costumes that are too long could cause children to trip or fall'. (No shit, Sherlock).

Children should also apparently be wearing 'sturdy, comfortable, slip resistant shoes' when they go trick or treating.' (Presumably because this involves walking around, something that children almost never do in suburbia...).

Other trick or treating advice includes taking a flashlight, being aware of neighbourhood dogs, and that 'it's a good idea to carry a cellphone when trick or treating, in case of emergencies'.

Who knew that Halloween could be so dangerous? I'm spooked already......

Monday 11 October 2010

Happy Columbus Day! A guide to American bank holidays

It's Columbus Day today, one of those nebulous quasi-holidays they have over here where the schools and banks are closed, there is no rubbish collection or post but other things seem to carry on as normal - eg. my husband is still expected to go to work, the boys' swimming lessons continue, etc., etc. On our trip to the playground this morning, I spotted legions of women whose other halves were clearly at work, desperately trying to entertain their kids for yet another day after the weekend.

The USA has quite a few Monday bank holidays. Some of them, like Memorial Day and Labor Day (marking the beginning and end of summer), are widely observed, but many of them seem semi-official - for instance Martin Luther King Day, in mid-January, and Presidents' Day in mid-February. Not every employer lets their staff take them off, and even if you do have the day off, not everything is open. For example, we were at the Bronx Zoo this weekend, and I noticed that it is only ever closed on Christmas Day, Thanksgiving and Martin Luther King day. OK, I can see that possibly this makes sense; it's the coldest time of year and all the animals will probably be huddled indoors somewhere drinking hot chocolate. But then again, what ARE you supposed to do on a bank holiday Monday in January? You can ski, but (having been researching ski resorts recently) I've also noticed that this is THE most expensive weekend of the year at some resorts. Or you can indulge in some shopping - every time there is a holiday, you are bombarded with advertising by stores like Macy's, which I can guarantee will today be having a Columbus Day mattress sale or similar.

Then there is the Friday between Thanksgiving (always a Thursday) and the weekend. It's not a public holiday, but everyone takes it off as holiday - everyone American, that is - and it is supposed to be one of the biggest shopping days of the year. Not being American, last year The Doctor determinedly went into work. I took the Littleboys to a 'holiday show' at the library, which was full of Dads.

Because of New York's large Jewish population, the schools here also observe various Jewish holidays, so they are closed, for instance, for Rosh Hashanah, in September (although not for Hanukah). However, again these are not public holidays. Most other business carries on as normal. These type of holidays are always acccompanied by a baffling announcement on the radio station that we listen to, telling us that in Manhattan, 'alternate side parking is suspended, but you still have to feed the meters'. It took us months to work out what this meant (basically it means that there is no street cleaning, therefore you don't have to worry about your car being towed if it is parked on the wrong side of the street, but parking is not free. Got that?).

In fact, you have to follow the school calendar quite carefully to work out exactly when school IS taking place. And hope they haven't misprinted the dates - last year I only worked out at the last minute that the boys only had a week's Easter break, as opposed to the three weeks indicated by the calendar I had been sent (and by that time we'd already booked a 10 day holiday...).

Still, it's not as eccentric as in Hong Kong, where I recall my primary school being closed for such holidays as the Queen's Birthday, our Headmistress's birthday and even when there was a major golf tournament (the headmistress being a keen golfer...!). Meanwhile a friend who lives in Dubai tells me that the start of the school year there was dependent on when the moon appeared in the sky after Ramadan; she didn't even know it was officially happening until a couple of days before......

Anyway, aside from all that, hope you are all having a great Columbus day! Now, we're off to swimming lessons.....

Monday 4 October 2010

You know you're the mother of boys when....

I was reading Potty Mummy's latest post and it reminded again me how much pleasure I get out of reading blogs by mothers who also have little boys. Not that I don't enjoy the others - I do, of course, (and I know that girls can be just as lively, frustrating and downright naughty). And, much as I love my boys deeply, there are some things that just particularly strike a chord with me; some things that mothers of sons can particularly appreciate.

Anyway, that's what inspired these random jottings on a Monday morning, and whether you have one boy or three, perhaps you'll recognise your own home life in some of them.

You know you're the mother of boys when...

1. You are constantly having your breasts grabbed and fondled - not just at home or lying in bed, but often in public at highly inappropriate moments, such as talking to teachers, the postman or a librarian.

2. The idea of any craft activity taking place in the home (painting in particular) fills you with horror, not maternal delight...

3. On any given day, you are quite likely to find
a) dinosaurs on your dining table at supper time
b) toy cars in your children's beds
c)dirty planks of wood in the back of your car

4. You don't have to worry (much) about tantrums over what clothes to wear in the morning. They don't care. More of a problem is getting them to sit still for two seconds in order to get dressed...

5. The idea of someone pooing in their pants is hilarious, not disgusting, to your children.

6. Every walk has to involve the collection, and ideally transportation home, of many kinds of stick....

7. The idea of staying inside the house all day because of the weather is just completely out of the question.

8. You realised long ago that kiddie activities that involved sitting still, such as Storytime at the Library, are not for you....

9. You only visit the supermarket with your children when you have absolutely no other option.

10. You get through a packet of plasters a week, and are regularly found mopping up blood or debating with your husband whether stitches are necessary. And you have more than once had to resort to antibiotics when cuts have become infected by dirty little fingers....

11. You cannot understand it when people say their children don't need a bath every day. Your own children's dirty bathwater is black every time....

12. You regularly watch your children wrestle each other like baby lion cubs, and have become immune to the accompanying screeching and yelling. Only when there is actual injury will you intervene....

13. At some point, you know you will have to become an expert, not just on subjects such as outerspace, makes of truck, dinosaurs and robots, of which you have scant knowledge, but probably also on stuff like Power Rangers, which you have no desire ever to know about.

14. Your son cannot remember the name of a single girl at school, or even appear to recognise them when they come up and say hello to him in the playground. (Note; they are not that much better with boys...).

15. Little girls come round to play at the house and complain that your children are too noisy. You agree with them.....

16. If they are hurt or upset, your little boys will always run to you for a cuddle. Because little boys worship their mothers - and note that that makes it all worthwhile........

Any other reasons to add?